Moving day

There are plenty to write about at the moment, so let me pick a topic that has generated a lot of excitement and anxiety in me. Moving…yes I am finally moving out. Some will argue that it is about time. To be honest, there are very few that will actually understand it. I have stopped a long time ago to explain it to people or to justify it.

I will not even try it here. I think I finally understand it myself. Part of the reluctance to move is my ultimate fear of being alone. It is a funny thing to say, especially coming from a loner and socially inept person.

But it is true, even though you keep to yourself and does your own thing; you still like the fact that there are people around you, even though you interact very little with them.

It is a little like society today. I see my best friend once every three months, yet we can talk daily via chat. I have more contacts today than I have ever had in my life. I probably talk to more people on a daily bases than what I have done before. Yet, when meeting them, I am still shy and still reserved, even though we have disclosed far worst things online.

So what is the big deal? You will still have the ability to talk to these people daily, why the fear of being alone? Is it because you know no one in the area, having someone you can just quickly pop into to say hi?

I think in the end, it is that need for human interaction, which drives even loners like me to either suicide or dating…Which one is worst, I don’t know…


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