Fridge attack


So we have an issue in the office with food being left in the fridge. In a attempt to be funny rather than stern I wrote this email to staff addressing the issue. Well, for most, it fly way above their heads. Anyway, I am sharing this here to amuse myself.


I received a memo from the occupants of the fridge demanding a minimum wage. You see some of them have been there so long that they have evolved from a simple jam in a jar, mayonnaise in a bakkie, joghurt in a small bakkie and Artist Redro (or the artist formerly known as Redro) into hair sprouting organisms with a conscience demanding compensation and better living conditions.

They also demanded the daily squatters that crowd their domain and then vacate at lunch without contributing to their local economy be barred from entry in the morning.  So as representative of the owner I told them they are illegally occupying our fridge and they will be evicted.

So as all of these politically charged situations, after tense talks,  I have arrange a compromise that they will be provided a safe place to stay with their former owners, alternatively I will have to forcibly remove them by Friday. So I am calling on all owners of said items to please come and collect them and return them to your respective domiciles.

This will be much appreciated since I cannot imagine the throwing of stones and burning of tires in protest will be a good site during our audit this week.


Digital life


My digital life started at age 23, in a world sans Facebook. Needless to say the online landscape has changed a lot the last 10 years. So much have changed in the way we connect, share and communicate. Sometimes it is hard to envision the old world. Most of these changes have been positive, but some of it, we sort of have failed to grasp the full impact at the time and now as time pass we are starting to understand the consequences and we better adapt.

Cyberbullying is a rising problem, and a definite consequence from our new profound digital life. Stories of children committing suicide, or resolving to violence to stop the onslaught have left us horrified.  As someone that was teased as a child, I will admit that the idea of it happening continuously is frightening to me. My escape was when the bell sounded for the day and my mom picked me up. We went home, where it was just me and my brother and the safety of our home. There was no ridicule, just peace, no Whatsapp, no Snapchat, no Facebook, no bullies, real or cyber. No day-care where the kids could bully me further. Thankfully, once I hit high school and my academic prowess started to show, I was left alone and found a home with the nerds and outcasts.

This generation of children whose digital life started at age 13 is maturing and we are slowly seeing the impact of their digital life on their real one. They are starting to pay the price of their ill-conceived public broadcasts. They are getting fired or turned down for jobs. Their digital life is having a profound impact on their actual life. Some of it foreseen, some not. So even though they might have survived their teens, they might suffer for it still.


As someone in my thirties and with friends having babies it seems left, right and centre, it got me thinking about this generation whose digital life started at age 0. Lots of my friends share photos of their kids on Facebook, from the first sonar to birth, some cute, some not, some definitely ill advised. As great as it is to see these children grow, it is also a treasure trove of potential cyberbullying material another 12 years from now.

All of us have embarrassing photos of us as a child. I have one where I sit with a cookie jar between my legs and my face covered in chocolate. Thankfully that is in a photo album in my mother’s closet.  But can you imagine the field day the bullies that teased me as a child about my weight would have had if they had access to it, and a way to harass me 24/7 and publicly? This is the sort of thing that the teenagers 12 years from now will potentially face.

Some of my friends on Facebook get it. They share very selective photos. Others unfortunately don’t. They have public profiles or friends of friend’s profiles.  They also don’t seem to have discretion when it comes to what they share. I fear for those kids. So please, if you are a parent or grandparent, consider what you share, how you share it and the impact on the life of your most precious gift, that of your child.



Dating is a brutal sport. Anyone that has ever dated will have their own stories of their misadventures. I started chatting to a potential great guy. Started out slow, which is actually a great sign of a person of substance. If the discussion heads south to packages size in less than 10 minutes it is normally a sure tell that the guy is just interested in NSA. This, this did not give off that vibe.

So, as always, I took my cue from my chat counterpart and just chatted about normal everyday stuff. I am not shy to share intimate details, but I let the other party bring that up. I really enjoy just chatting for company’s sake. From our chats, it became clear that we really had a lot of things in common which excited me. It has been a while since I connected with someone.

Anyway, what was meant to be a rapid sharing session after he revealed that he is kind of excited about the prospects from our chats as well, but that he does have some concerns like the 5 year age gap, I let slipped that I am hairy. Now, firstly, I understand the dislike, I am not a great fan of this much hair either, but it turns out that being hairy is a deal breaker for him. He could not date a hairy person, but he can sleep with him if I am interested.

Now people have dismissed me because I am over weight. They have dismissed me because I am not a model, but this one was rather a spanner in the works I did not see coming.  As to how much of a deal it is, it has killed all interest to chat.

Being a guy that thinks of himself as just a normal guy, gaylife can be hard to phantom, let alone understands. To all singles, I hope with you all that there is indeed a lit for this particular pot casted and that it still looking as well.

Faux Best Interest


If there was ever a terrifying thought for any introvert, then it should be representing your company at a trade show. It sounds pure torture. So yesterday when I was asked if I would work at the Good food and Wine show I was wondering what these people were thinking. Firstly, I am no sales person and definitely not outgoing. I struggle to make small talk with a dog, let alone a human. Luckily they had a great selling point as to why I should accept: “You might actually meet someone at the show”.

Thanks for turning my lack of a boyfriend into a selling feature so that I can cover for you while you could not plan to be present at the show yourself. That annoyance aside, the portion that bugs me the most is what gives these people the right to even say something like it? Yes I am 34 and single, don’t have any prospects of a potential boyfriend on the radar, but what gives them the right to reduce my personal and painful situation into what feels like a punch line for a joke at my expense?

To say that this angers me and annoy me, well that is an understatement.

Will to live


I arrived at work on Tuesday with the news that one of our workers committed suicide over the weekend. We were discussing it and we all concluded that he was a quiet guy, that always showed up at work, never an issue, but in the same way, we also did not know much about him. Only that he did not the type to commit suicide. That is what got me thinking however, who is that type? What cause one to stop to have the will to live?

It is a hard thing to contemplate in the one sense, because we as humans have the will to live, to fight. We are so stubborn, we will kill each other just to advance ourselves or our cause, yet we are also capable to be depressed, withdrawn and lonely to the point that there shines no light in our life. There have certainly been days that I have wondered why I live this life. Why I am racing on this road to nowhere all alone? Why I keep on putting myself out there to meet someone, only to be rejected?

I am no stranger to these dark thoughts, but in the end I have always reminded me on the good things in my life and that is maybe why I am writing this. When we interact with a person or a stranger, treat them like you would like to be treated. Remind them that there are still good and kind people in this life, that despite the dark clouds, there is always a sunny day coming again. It might not be paradise, but it is your life and in ways unenvisioned by you, it is precious.

What is Windows?


I have been meaning to write about Windows 8 for a while now and as the discussion starts around Windows “Blue” I thought it is a good time to reflect a little about Windows 8.

I think the biggest misconception among people and tech journalist is the distinction between Windows (the platform) and Windows the products build from that platform and Graphical interfaces that we use in those products to interact with Windows. I think if everyone just step back a moment and remember these things, we might be in a far better position to understand what is happening going forward.

Windows firstly is a platform that consists of a Kernel (abstraction layer between hardware and software, currently 6.2 in Windows 8) with low level runtimes and API’s associated with it and some core key components, like a network stack and a driver stack. That is in its essence Windows!

Now, prior to Windows 8, the runtimes was called Win32 (an evolution of Win16). Every application known to Windows was build using these. They were presented in a Graphical User interface called the Desktop. The Desktop really is just a tablecloth; the table is Windows (Kernel and runtimes). You still with me?

The Desktop allowed us to interact with Windows, to run applications on top of Windows, configure Windows in a way that is simple, easy and non-technical (I am being generous).

In Windows 8, the table that is Windows got expanded. We still have Win32 runtimes from previous Windows, but added is a new set of runtimes called WinRT. These I would like to think of like the in-laws, they don’t talk to the rest and think they are better, but they are civil and they sit around the same table and they are still the same family. These set of runtimes have their own graphical user interface and their own ways to interact and configure Windows, called the Start screen and Charms.

Now that we are clear as to what is Windows (the platform), what is runtimes (Win32 and WinRT) and what is Graphical user interfaces (Desktop and Start Screen, charms) we can look at this and say WOW, what a mess and Microsoft kindly called this a product and named it Windows 8.

So how is Microsoft evolving this mess forward with Windows Blue / Next / 9. Firstly, it is consolidating the interface to configure Windows. It is duplicating the Control panel (Desktop) functions in the PC settings (Start and Charms). I am not sure if they will remove Control panel in Blue already, but I suspect you might find that some of the duplication being removed going forward, with PC settings remaining as the sole way of configuring Windows.

At some stage I think it is possible that Microsoft could / might remove the Desktop completely. (Now please breath) Desktop is just a user interface. The runtimes to make your application run will still be there (it is Win32 that makes your applications sing, not the desktop). One way of doing this will be to ring-fence / fortify Win32 runtimes. Either by UAC every time you run an application or once when you authorise it to run. This way you can negate the negative impact of unwelcome Win32 application (malware). Full screen applications are the easiest, since they run full screen already. For windowed applications they could easily use the Start screen background and tattoo as the back ground for the application to run. It is one way to eliminate the confusion that the duel nature of Windows 8. Doing this, they could make these application basically run just like WinRT applications, each one on their own (just like a virtual machine) without the penalties of virtualisation as these application will still be native. You might even be able to save their state and suspend them.

Or they could choose to maintain the Desktop interface going forward, run all your Win32 applications like you do today, but that environment will be nothing more than just a way to present your legacy applications.

One can also dream and maybe they enable to new “Desktop” where both WinRT and Win32 applications run side by side windowed or full screen as needed. One can dream I said!

Domesticated man


As a single guy, one of the tragic things to do is put yourself out there for meeting people. Meeting likeminded people is difficult enough, being gay, a bit over weight and hairy is triple so much. This post is not about my lack of a dating life, but rather something else which came up during a chat with someone new.

It is hard enough to make small talk, getting to know a person online, getting a feel for them. One of the easier things to talk about is how your day was and what you did. So being a Saturday I run through my day for the guy. It started with two loads of washing (and you wonder why I struggle to pull people in), then a dash to the mall for my hair cut. Back home I did house cleaning and sorting and folding my clothes. So his comment back to me is: You sound so domesticated.

For a moment there I was not sure if it was a compliment or complaint. To be honest, I am still not sure, but it got me thinking. He is correct, I am a domesticated man. I grow up in a household were we did everything our self. My mom did not have help; she had two sons that she made sure we did our part. The upside to that (not that I saw it that way growing up) is that it is something that I just do. It is part of the routine. Unlike our childhood home, my house is a small duplex, with far less furniture and carpets. So cleaning it is actually a pleasure compared to our childhood home.

Now, I am speaking for myself, I don’t know what other thirty year old middle income people do. Chances are they have a help come in once a week. Having a look around our complex, that does not seem far off.